Lupron Injections...yeah, I'm a big fat chicken!

The lupron injections so far have been a piece of cake, for Hunnie! Haha He has been my saving grace the past 6 days. I did not realize I had such an aversion to needles until the syringe was in my hand and I could NOT do it myself. I just cant picture puncturing my own skin *shivers* Each time Hunnie does it for me I hesitate, tell him to “wait..wait wait!!” and then when it is all done I always say “oh that was not bad at all!” it is not painful, there is no tenderness or sore feeling at the injection sites. There is some bruising but that’s just a cosmetic annoyance, and there is no side effects that I am feeling thus far. I am off the horrible birthcontrol pills they had me on that put me on the verge of feeling sad and mad the majority of the time. Knowing it was just the pills helped me get over it, cheer up and carry on. No one likes a grumpy mommy and girlfriend so there was no other choice really. So now that I am off the BC pills I am as happy as can be again. I like this happy mommy MUCH better (I am sure everyone else in the house does too!)  all that said, tonight will be the first night that my dear boyfriend will not be home on time to give me the shot! I will have to do it myself!! Thought my darling 7 year old has made it quite clear that she is more than willing to do it for me if I chicken out again. Of course I will HAVE to do it myself, there is no way around that but I picture it being similar to the Blue/Red pen scene from the Jim Carry movie “Liar Liar” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jiDa5KJ1ww) Why am I such a baby about it? I am happy to pop out 1-2 babies in 10 months with no pain meds but somehow this tiny little needle haunts my dreams. This needle is not even the bad one, the next one is about three times the size, I am told that one (for progesterone) is not fun, painful, takes forever, and leaves bruises and sore tooshys. Well I have approximately 16 more weeks of needles so this mama has better suck it the heck up and get used to it! **or just steal one of hunnies beers and gain some liquid courage while I still can :P  

><*20 Days Until Transfer*><

 

The First night

Last night was the first night of the dreaded needle! It well well…if you ask my hunnie he might say differently haha. I received the package of goodies and when that package came in I felt like it was Christmas! I could not wait to open it and look though it. I called my mom (who also works in the same building and she called another co-worker and we all “oooh’d” and “aaah’d” at its contents. I was happy to see that the needles I am to use right now are tiny, but I was terrified to see the needles I will be using soon. They are the size of a butcher knife! Okay, maybe not an entire butcher knife, maybe just like half! I don’t know how I am going to get used to those needles but I will worry (and blog) about that when that day comes. So back to last night, we got home and I was anxious and excited to get it over with. The instructions that came with my box were not very helpful. Thankfully along the way I have met a few awesome surrogates and one offered to email me her instructions with where detailed and great! (Thanks again Breanna!) so we read over the instructions, and again…and maybe one more time, then (as requested) I Skyped my mom and my 7 year old daughter who was with her at the time. We prepped the area (and iced it at the suggestion of yet another awesome surro) and with my mom, her girlfriend, and my daughter all rooting me on we were ready for injection. It of course did not happen the first, or second or third time. Finally after about 20 mins of me saying “okay im ready…NO! wait!” to my hunnie I finally let him poke me (or he forced me, I don’t remember which now). Of course it did not hurt and I was so glad it was over, now the rest of the days should be a breeze (until we get to the needle the size of a house!) In addition to the shot, I choked down a horse pill of a prenatal, and a few other pills prescribed to me. Later that night, I just kept reflecting on how awesome this is! I am so happy that we are getting closer and closer, I am so happy that I chose this path in life, and I am so lucky to have such an amazing boyfriend, family and friends who are so supportive and are never shy to let me know they are behind me and love what I am doing. It really keeps me going!

We Have Dates!

We have dates!!! I was so excited when I got the email yesterday that I screamed and danced, my two lovely daughters soon joined me in my dance and giggle fest. I am just so filled with joy that this is finally happening, and SOON! Over a year ago I brought this crazy idea of mine up to my hunnie who had to ponder it for a few days before realizing how amazing it is. We met (T) and (S) almost 7 months ago, and now, we will actually be getting the physical side of this going. So I should be receiving my special delivery of meds tomorrow afternoon. I will begin daily Lupron injections (nervous about the needle thing!) that day as well as a daily prenatal, an aspirin (which is something I have not heard of surros taking but SDFC is one of the best fertility clinics in the U.S so I will oblige) and continuing the birth control pills (that I can’t wait to get off of because they make me all bloaty and PMS-y) There are a few ultrasounds to make sure everything is responding right and depending on how the egg donor responds to her meds we will have our embryo transfer on August 5th! I can’t even believe it, if all goes right and those embryos stick (S) and (T) will be a mom and dad to two beautiful babies by May. I am a little nervous about the injections. Sure I can pop out a baby with no pains meds no problem, but sticking a needle in my rear *shivers* I am pretty sure tomorrow night will consist of me getting it all set up and prepped, then chickening out 700 times, asking hunnie to do it but then hitting his hand away multiple times until he somehow tricks me into it. We have a tradition in our family that when someone gets a shot at the doctors we go out and get a milkshake afterwards, it has always eased the fears of flu shots and immunizations with the kids. So the first thing my eldest daughter said was “WAIT! So you get a shot every day!? That means we get milkshakes everyday!!!!” maybe we will do a once a week thing, if that, I hear these meds plump you up - because the birth control they have me on is not doing enough of that already! *rolls eyes* oh well the weight gain is only temporary and pales in comparison to the absolute joy and happiness I am feeling and will bring to (S) and (T) and their family. Ironically we just had lunch while we were in the area with our IP’s and we met (S)’s parents who were visiting from Canada. They were all able to me my 7 year old Kendra and we all had a great lunch and left with encouraging words from Intended Grandparents and a wish from us all that it will happen soon! Sure enough, the very next day we are planning to be pregnant in less than a month. What a crazy thought, I am going to be pregnant, with two beautiful embryos that WILL (any and all happy prayers and thoughts are welcome!) stick and grow and flourish into two healthy babies who will beat me from the inside out. I cannot wait. I cannot wait to get past those very scary weeks of “did they stick?” and tell (S) and (T) they are going to be parents. I can’t wait for them to watch as their baby(s) grow and stretch my belly, or when we find out the sex, when we look at their cute face(s) on the ultrasound machine, I can’t wait for the day where I can say “Today is the day!” and most of all, I cannot wait to see them holding their baby, that moment when they become parents and their whole life changes in ways only a parent will ever know. This is such an amazing journey just waiting to develop…but first things first….the needle…(DUN-DUN-DUUUUNNN)